Bikes belong on bike paths!

As a man, an American MAN, who drives a truck, I’ve got to say I am sick and tired of all those cyclists out there using my roads, riding down the road, hugging that white line in their little sissy tights and bright neon jerseys.

Don’t they understand that roads were made for cars, and trucks, big trucks like mine!? One of my favorite things to do is when I see a cyclist with his or her smug little grin pedaling down the road, I like to pass them as close as I can so that they feel the wind and the power left behind by my V8 engine! Just to add a little extra insult, I swerve over into the bike lane just as I pass them, to let them know that if I had wanted to, I could have taken them out. The nerve! 

If God wanted us law abiding, God fearing truck drivers to have to share the road with cyclists, He wouldn’t have created bike paths! That’s right, bikes belong on bike paths, trucks belong on the road! Get it straight people!

                                                                              (Take that cyclists!! Yeeeeee haw!)

I fail to understand why anyone would want to put on form fitting tights, sit in a hard saddle and use their own two legs to get from point A to point B. The engine was created for a reason! Humankind evolved, as God intended no doubt, and invented the gas guzzling, exhaust producing, non-renewable resource burning engine for a reason! We no longer have to put forth any effort or use any form of exercise to get around.

These cyclists are creepy people who refuse to get with the times! I will never understand them, and I don’t want to. I’ll just continue to let them know in my not-so-subtle way that trucks rule the roads, and roads were made for trucks! (sarcasm intended)